Thursday, April 30, 2009

Absentee Blogger

So, I've totally been on hiatus, huh? Don't be angry with me, I've been busy. With what? I guess I can't say. Just life. It's been hectic. When my husband and I were pregnant with our first child we assumed that our lives would be less busy, we'd travel less and just be home more. So not true. Life continues at the same frantic pace, and you're left dealing with the stress of having to drag your kid along.

I've also had a couple things going on that I haven't necessarily wanted to blog about, as this blog was quickly discovered by my Dad and more recently by at least one of my younger sisters and my Mom. Isn't it interesting that I'm comfortable venting and revealing personal details to strangers, but am not really interested in sharing my thoughts with my family? I've already censored my thoughts and "stuff" a lot... and now knowing that my whole family is privy to it all makes me feel like a teenager who's Dear Diary has been passed around. I guess I could ask them not to read it, but know them and thereby know they'd read it anyway. So here I am, stunted in my creative endeavor.

Anyway, one of the things I "could not" blog about is my pregnancy. Yay! I'm having a baby! It's nice to say that. I'm not terribly superstitious about the 1st trimester thing, at least I wasn't in the past. Had I been blogging during my first and second pregnancy, I'm certain I would've said something much sooner. As it is, I'm about 18 weeks now and haven't been terribly public about it. We told our families right away and I've been telling friends when I see them, but as a "blogger" and on Facebook I haven't wanted to say anything. I'm sure some of my FB friends could guess, but I'm just not certain I want it out there. Is that strange? Maybe it's because I've done this all before and have 2 beautiful and healthy boys that I realize how delicate it all is and know that anything can go wrong. Maybe as I've gotten older I've become less comfotable with being the center of attention. Maybe I was so surprised by it that it's taken me extra long to wrap my brain around it all. Maybe it's because I know this is my last pregnancy that I want to keep it mine, keep it all to myself, keep it private and special. I don't know...

But now I feel comfortable talking about what's been in my head for so long. So, I'm due October 8th, and won't find out the baby's sex. We didn't find out with the boys, and I see no reason to find out this time either. I told my husband that if I know, I'll just start shopping, and we really don't need that, do we?

Three is daunting, huh? Maybe it's just me, but it makes me nervous. I know my husband is freaking out, but what doesn't he freak out about? It's that whole "we'll be out-numbered" thing. I have a hard time getting 2 into bed, I just can't imagine having another one in the queue. Or maybe with the boys turning 5 and 3 it'll be easier than when Champ was just 2 and Bear was a newborn. Awww, aren't I cute? I'm trying to talk myself out of a panic attack...

Anyway, I hope to be posting more, but really can't make any promises about it. It might not be interesting or funny, because I'm only funny when I'm hammered and, sadly, no booze for me. See, I love my baby! (But this is the last one because, damn, I love my wine.)


3 comments:

Urban Mom said...

SOOOO exciting! Congratulations! If it's another boy, you should be allowed to have your own bathroom where *nobody* but you is allowed to enter.

;-)

And don't worry -- I'll drink the wine that you don't. Happy to pick up the slack there. I'm here to help with that one.

Dad29 said...

Awwwwwwwww..........

You'll be outnumbered!!!

Just remember: age and treachery overcome youth and vigor EVERY TIME.

Heh, heh, heh.

MaMulsoff said...

Congratulations! You and Leslie (Rob's wife) are at about the same place!